Today was hard. So many times I caught myself being mad or crabby or frustrated and I tried so hard to turn my attitude around. I looked hard but I found very little attributes.
Jacob was a total mess. He had a new meltdown at every turn. When he wasn't having a meltdown, he was biting Ryan's finger, poking Ryan in the face, coughing in MY face, and most definitely NOT doing as he was told. I wanted to run away.
Ryan, as always, was very good and very happy. But he's not the best napper. I can usually handle a clingy baby just fine. But when Jacob drives me to the end of my sanity, it doesn't take much more to make me feel like my whole world is spiraling out of control. And OMG, I'm out of Diet Dr. Pepper. And I just spilled Ryan's formula all over the table. And I rammed my shin against our bed for the third time today! And when I finally got to the gym at 8 oclock, I discovered it had JUST closed. The world is conspiring against me. There is NO ESCAPE!
On days like today, I try to count my blessings. Today, I don't have to count very high.
1) Chocolate covered almonds
2) Being able to nap with Ryan. When we nap together, he closes his eyes, arches his back towards me, and reaches his hands out to touch my face. He will fall asleep with either his fingers gouging out my cheeks or his hand cradling my face. It's very sweet- or painful.
3) Not getting stabbed or shot when, upon discovering the gym was closed, I decided to run 4 miles around the outdoor track. In the dark.
Please, Tomorrow, please be better!
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